Growing up, "You are strong" was a constant. My dad used to look at me with pride and say, "You are my strong puth," a term of endearment in our Indian community. On the surface, it seemed like a compliment, a badge of honour. But as I grew older, I realized that behind those words was an unspoken expectation: to endure, suppress, and shoulder burdens without complaint.
In the Indian community, "You are strong" often translates to "You must bear your pain in silence." It's a phrase steeped in history, used to shape generations of men and women into stoic figures who must bite their tongues and hold back tears. For men, especially, it's a term that reinforces the idea that showing emotions is a sign of weakness. It's a subtle yet powerful way of saying that to be strong; one must also be silent about their struggles. I remember moments when I felt overwhelmed, lost, and desperately needed help. But each time, my dad's words echoed in my mind, reminding me of the strength I was supposed to embody. It wasn't just my dad – the community, the culture, and the weight of generations telling me to seek help was to admit defeat.
Men in our community are often told to cry in corners, as are women, as are all individuals, to hide their emotions behind closed doors. The stigma surrounding mental health is pervasive and deeply rooted in the belief that acknowledging one's struggles is a sign of weakness. This mentality has created a culture where suffering in silence is the norm, and seeking help is seen as a last resort. But strength doesn't mean we have to endure alone. Strength can also mean recognizing when we need support and having the courage to ask for it. It's taken me years to learn that being vital means never showing vulnerability. True strength lies in acknowledging our emotions and caring for our mental well-being.
Breaking this stigma is crucial, not just for ourselves but for future generations. We need to create a culture where it's okay to express emotions, seek help, and prioritize mental health. It's time to redefine what it means to be strong. In our community, men and women are often told to hold their emotions in and to be the pillars of strength for their families. But this expectation can be damaging. It creates a facade of invincibility, masking the genuine struggles that many of us face. Mental health issues don't disappear just because we refuse to acknowledge them. They fester and grow, impacting our lives in ways we might not even realize.
I've read countless articles and heard many stories of individuals in the Indian community who have suffered in silence, their pain dismissed by the very words meant to encourage them. It's heartbreaking to see how deeply this stigma has affected so many lives. But there's hope. By sharing our stories and speaking out about our experiences, we can begin to dismantle the harmful beliefs that have held us back for so long. So, to anyone who has ever been told "You are strong" to dismiss their pain, know that Your strength is not measured by your ability to endure in silence. True strength is vulnerability, seeking help, and prioritizing your well-being. Let's break the cycle of silence and create a community where mental health is valued and supported. Together, we can redefine what it means to be strong. We can build a future where our children grow up knowing it's okay to feel, express, and seek help. Let's be the generation that changes the narrative, embraces the full spectrum of human emotions, and supports one another on the journey to mental wellness.
Yes, you are strong, but that doesn't mean you don't need help. Seeking support is a testament to your strength. It means you understand that true strength comes from recognizing your limits and knowing when to reach out. Embracing vulnerability allows you to grow and become even stronger. By asking for help, you are taking care of yourself and setting an example for others. Let's redefine strength together by acknowledging our needs, supporting each other, and creating a community where everyone can thrive.
Until next time, take care of yourselves, and remember: It's okay to ask for help when you need it. Your strength lies in your courage to be vulnerable.
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